Learning tech stuff

So, I decided to add a newsletter block to my website so people can sign up for a regular newsletter. Great idea! Squarespace offers a lot of help with all aspects of the website, video tutorials and in depth instructions.

But I have discovered my learning style with anything computer related seems to be…..watch 6 videos…read instructions 6 times…follow the promts….wander off course and get hopelessly confused…believe I have it right…..doesn’t work….delete everything I’ve done and start again.

Give me some wire to twist, a structural issue with a sculpture, finding the right glue or figuring out the right materials for a job and I’m all over it.

Give me a technical problem to solve with my sculpture, I’m all over it.

Well, apparently, it’s best practice to have an email attached to my website. Breaking into a cold sweat at the thought of going into ‘Settings’ I worked my way through it….what are MX records? what is my server?…do I really want to complete this action? After some time, feeling sightly dehydrated after so much concentrating and with a sore brain, I successfully created an email and signed up to google workspace.

Which apparently was not what I was supposed to do.

Well, that’s a day of my life I’ll never get back. Feeling confused and discouraged I went off and made something which made me feel happier.

So today is working out much better. I successfully deleted everything I had done and ready to attempt newsletter signup number two. Not today though….I have some procrastination to do first.

Might go and make something.

Working through it

I’ve been through a bit of a rough time recently. Something happened that absolutely floored me, and my usual resilience and natural optimism deserted me.

Now, I’ve always imagined the inside of my head like a massive storage room/factory with workers shoveling stuff from boxes into giant furnaces (bit like the Titanic but hopefully with better decisions being made) The foreman for some reason is a burly whiskered man with an English accent. (wait- I think borrowed him from the movie!) “Send down some more nostalgia - she’s looking at old photos” - “she’s going in for another glass of wine…she’ll be dancing next….noooo…. dial back the fine motor skill so she knocks it over” - that sort of thing.

These wee guys usually have my back, but this time they kept shoveling on the negative thoughts and feelings.

To stop myself thinking, I started to make and make and make. I completely immersed myself in my work and my creativity absolutely flourished.

I totally immersed myself in my work.

Only problem was the negative thoughts were still there. I thought- right- I’ll listen to uplifting podcasts while I’m working, improve myself and who knows maybe even grow a super brain while I’m getting work done!

Well, what I discovered was to make sure self-improvement stuff is all of a similar theme. One morning I listened to “The subtle art of not giving a f*ck’ and followed it up with something that seemed to encourage you to get up every morning thinking “what great thing will happen today'?” So now I don’t know if I’m supposed to give a f*ck if something great happens today.

But I did some really good work on a dragon.

Got some great work done while listening to podcasts.

I listened to one about heart chakras, visualizing my heart chakra expanding filling me with love enveloping negativity. I lay back, closed my eyes and visualized my heart chakra as an expanding whirlpool of love…….

Heart chakra turned into a suddenly expanding giant balloon angrily pinging off negative thoughts that took the shape of little stick figures while for some reason a medieval jester floated above laughing evilly.

But I got a great mask done.

So, for now, I have turned to the sage advice from world renowned philosopher Ozzy Osbourne.

Mask making

I’ve always had a bit of a fascination with masks. I remember as an art student wandering the cold Dunedin streets coming across a small gallery workshop in Moray place. Walking up the stairs to the gallery there were beautiful richly colored elaborate masks lining the walls. Made from paper mache, with feathers and fabric adorning them, I was stunned and amazed. I can’t remember who made them now, but I had quite a lengthy discussion and she kindly gave me a beautifully crafted mask base.

Thanks, you wonderful inspirational person!

The mask base that I use to shape my masks is underneath this one in progress.

I left the gallery with a sense of wonder, but my artistic direction wandered off into large abstract paintings for a while (Large abstract paintings seemed to be the thing to do in the 90’s)

Well, I had hung on to the mask and the seed of an idea, and fast forward 30 years I am using it to provide the shaping for the masks I am making now.

One of my Medusa inspired masks

I was making wall hung masks or ‘heads’ I suppose, not made to be worn, and made from paper mache. I liked the idea of a mask that looked good on a wall, but also could be worn, so made some from paper mache with flower clay adornments.

Made from paper mache with flower clay details.

I then decided to make them lighter and try flower clay for the whole thing. This is what I love about ideas and materials, they spark off each other. I also love that some inspiration from 30 years ago is impacting my decisions today!

They are still not a mask you would want to wear for a long time, but I like the idea that they could be worn for a bit. Have some great ideas about photos with then being worn. I have some inspiration from some artwork I have seen, might have to do it sooner than 30 years…..

Flower clay

Something exciting about working with mixed media and experimenting with materials is that something will grab you and open up other possibilities.

My current ‘love affair’ with flower clay came about because of my search for a material that would allow me to go finer and more delicate than paper mache. With paper mache I had created quite small and also people-sized pieces, refining techniques as I discovered more of its capeabilities and limitations.

I was using air dry and oven bake clays for teeth and toenails for some of my creations.

Nice set of chompers on this dragon.

I was introduced to ‘cold porcelain’ by a fellow artist and friend. It was a homemade version using cornflour and PVA glue. When it dried it allowed me to make really fine points on teeth and claws without chipping as it remains flexible.

I started to make smaller birds and animals with the paper mache, then wanted to get finer with more detail, so I started playing….

I was using wire for strength in the paper mache works but then figured I could bulk out the shape where I wanted with foil and layer the clay fairly thinly over to get the fine look I was after.

I wanted quite slim legs, going for a kind of ‘creepy elegance’ I suppose.

I also found I can go really thin with it and make fine petals, leaves and twisty bits suggestive of forests and moss.

The body of this one was made from air dry clay, the finer parts flower clay.

This just the start of my adventures with the medium, I have found out that I have to use it with confidence and know exactly what I want to do, as it starts to be unworkable in about 5 minutes, so I’m taking little pieces out at a time and keeping the rest covered. No time for playing with it.

Flower clay. dries quickly and remains flexible great for fine and thin work. Adheres well to itself while still soft. The disadvantage is also that it dries really quickly so there is not a lot of time for playing around with it.

Demonstration days

Otago Arts Society demonstration days. A fantastic time to connect with other artists and visitors and also get a bit of work done. I find it very insightful looking at how other artists work, some plan out very carefully, some more casual in their approach. Although our approaches and mediums may differ, we still can learn so much from each other and also from the conversation with visitors.

Some conversations lead to new ideas and approaches, new friends and during the weekend there is a real feeling of support and community.

All packed up and ready to go

As I’m not taking any of my large pieces, it was a much easier trip and setup this time. The gallery was wonderful and warm as were the conversations on a cold frosty Dunedin weekend.

I find it great talking about how I make things, it’s easier than talking about why I make things. I love the technical discussions about what wire thickness I use, properties of paper mache or the different qualities of air dry clays or glues.

The discussions of why I am drawn to certain ideas are a little trickier, (sometimes I’m really not sure) but good practice for writing about my work as it helps clarify my ideas and approach in my own mind.

All set up and ready to go.

In between the talk, I also got some work done.

I’ve been working on fantasy animal and bird figurines, using a wire frame bulked out with foil and a thin layer of air-dry clay over top. I get quite excited talking about properties of the different clays and sent many people off with photos of the wrapping, so much that I think I should have shares in the company!

Sharing information has always been an important part of my approach, I’m not worried that someone may take my ideas and start making what I do. If I can help someone with some technical aspects, even if some of my ideas are borrowed, that person will still be making their own art and if I can help them get there, that’s great!

Chickadees and Floofs

I’ve been making critters that, for me is quite a change. Frivolous, cheeky and cute! Not words previously associated with my work.

Made from air dry clays, I’ve added possum fur and marbles for eyes, these little guys fit beautifully into the palm of my hand and beg to be patted.

Most my critters have a kind of' ‘Just came up from the bowels of Hell and now shaking off the residue from an atomic blast’ sort of look. Sometimes I’ve tried to aim for odd yet elegent, I made a reindeer and someone commented “Oh I love it, you’ve made Satan’s reindeer”. (I laughed and laughed, and yes, it does look like Satan would be happy to hop on the back of it and travel around the world snatching souls.

Satan’s Reindeer

‘Alby” a little bit cute, still might give you a fright if you woke up to him staring down at you.

I do have a liking for long skinny limbs and sharp claws which adds to the ‘creepy’ element in a lot of my works.

Now, I was thinking of a little critter, simple, with no sharp claws or teeth and started making these “baby birds” that a friend called ‘Chickadees”. Now ‘Chickadees’ is about as frivolous and unscary name you could think of. I could hardly believe it! Here I am, making something that is wholesome and cute, with not a glimmer of darkness and despair!

Of course, once I’d made some of these chickadees I started to play with different ears and noses instead of beaks. I figure they can’t be Chickadees without beaks so had to think of another name as well.

“Floof”, according to the dictionary is an exceptionally furry or hairy animal, especially a cat or dog. Bat, cat, dog, possum, seems to be a good fit.

Well', until I think of attaching scary monster teeth!

Updating websites

Well, I’ve been really slack in one of the important parts of an artist’s life. The administration part of it!

There has been a lot happening art-wise for me this year and I need to now spend some time updating my website.

Here’s a quick recap of what’s been happening. A year condensed into 5 images.

I’ve been exploring different ideas with my figurines, adding riders.

I’ve been exploring painting faces, there’s a moody something I keep coming back to with this idea.

I’ve been playing around with paper Mache masks with extensions made with wire for branch-like effects. Designed for wall display and wearing, they then led me on a search for lighter materials

A lot of the inspiration for my works are driven by the qualities of the mediums I work in, in this case the need for something lighter and easier worn led me to flower clay and finer wire.

While all this was happening, inspired by this feel of twisting branches I have been recently working on paintings that reflect patterns and twisted branch shapes.

Video voice

After posting on social media a short video of my studio including me speaking, I had the immediate urge to apologize to any unfortunate person who watched it with the sound on.

Just call me “Monotone Mary”, I have discovered I have a “Video Voice”, a term I have just made up. It’s similar to the “Photo Face” that we are more familiar with. You may know the feeling…. the camera is on you and every muscle freezes into a strange mask, lips rigidly stuck in a “say Cheese” expression.

I have huge skill in this area and could have been a supermodel in earlier times, being able to hold this expression for at least the 15 minutes required to take a photo. Trying for a profile picture can take 50 attempts to get something that looks semi-natural.

my standard “cheese” smile

The “Video Voice” does not happen in casual conversation, it comes out when a speaking part in a video. Trying to inject different tones is useless, any attempt comes across as crazed.

I once wanted to put a light and breezy welcome on my answer phone. After 20 attempts I now have a welcome that sounds as if I’ve just climbed 50 sets of stairs and am now waiting for an ambulance.

I may have to practice a bit. I would like to post a few online tutorials and have discovered its not just the technical aspects I need to learn but also my own hang-ups around showing myself and speaking.

I could wear a mask to really hide behind my work.

Its much easier to hide behind the work, I’ve become used to putting my work in front of an audience, and not too bad at speaking in front of people, but speaking to a camera feels like I’m talking to nobody. I think it’s the lack of eye contact that changes the feel for me.

I hugely admire those people who can talk easily on camera, as if they’re having a conversation with you.

Or maybe I need to invent an imaginary friend to talk to.

Wonder

On my morning walk I was thinking about (you might say wondering) about Wonder. Kicked off I suppose by re- reading “Electric Universe” by David Bodanis. It’s a fascinating book about the complex subject of electricity but written as a story of discovery, scientific breakthroughs and the very human stories of the people involved.

It got me thinking about the word “Wonder” and how crucial it is to any sort of human endeavor. The words “I wonder….” are involved in both the very big discoveries and the very small.

I wonder what the link is between magnetism and electricity?

I wonder what tomato added to this recipe will taste like?

I wonder if this clay will hold together at this thickness?

Taking some photos on my lawn led me to wonder what setting my critters up in a forest location would look like.

Turns out forest locations are a great idea. I’ve also discovered better ideas for eyes, beaks and adornments through experimenting with materials.

Part of this “wondering” was what little riders would look like on my creatures, and what materials I could use so I could make them being smaller and finer than the steeds.

That feeling of wonder is central to my work, experimenting with ideas and materials is how new combinations come together. Some are discarded, many ideas and materials don’t work as well as I thought they might but its immensely satisfying when they do.

I wondered what it would look like to take photos of masks up at this location. It fueled some great ideas that I’ve stored up to revisit at a later stage.

It takes time to keep the sense of wonder and curiosity alive. Wondering about things takes time, time to put materials and colours together, time to play with my art, time to wonder about things other than art too.

What is the link between magnetism and electricity………? Best I keep reading.

Inspiration

Living in a country with spectacular natural beauty I’m surrounded by inspiration. Food for the soul! I love the big vistas, a spectacular sky and mountains but the small details draw me in. Mosses, twisted tree roots and fungi are the things that fire up my imagination.

Wow! hard not to be moved by this!

I find it intriguing how personal preferences shape not only how we see things, but also what we look at in the first place. A light pattern in a forest, a perfect grouping of toadstools, a fairly ordinary beach-washed tree are the things I will notice. Someone else will have completely different experience.

Nice little grouping on one of my walks

Moeraki has more than just boulders.

I find it a bit overwhelming the amount of images on social media, again its my preferences that lead me to certain artists, I have artists that I study because there’s a certain “flavour” to their art that I admire, and other artists who have completely different work from me, but an expertise in technical skill I would like to achieve.

At an exhibition I will be the person with their nose up close to the artwork trying to figure out how they did it.

One of my little forest creatures.

Its one of the things I love about the mystery of art making, the fact that their is no one source all my likings and leanings, an idea had today can be a slow burning idea from years ago, or something I saw yesterday.

One of my regular spots for taking photos of my creatures.

The Cat Burglar

I was thinking of an idea for a cat themed exhibition called “Meow”, a celebration of the feline kind. As I was itching to create another big piece, of course I was going to do a giant cat of some kind. Turns out a humanish cat person is just what was needed. For this one I had an idea behind it. Schrodinger’s Cat..

I came across this when I was reading about quantum mechanics (before discovering that at least for me, it was an unknowable quagmire of confusion)

Schrodinger proposed a thought experiment where a cat, a flask of poison, and a radioactive source are placed in a sealed box. If an internal monitor detects radioactivity (a single atom decaying) the flask is shattered and the cat dies. The idea being that until the box is opened and the cat is observed the cat is simultaneously alive and dead.

So the artwork is kind of a cat rescue situation, the cat burglar rescuing Schrodinger’s cat.

The frame leans slightly forward to get the best stability.

First I went to see my personal welder to get a frame made (thanks Dad!) Then I began building up the form with newspaper and paper mache.

I wanted to have the figure holding a cat cage, a wine box was the perfect size. I put a lot of wire and paper mache strengthening in the arms, particularly the one holding the cage as I didn’t want it to droop with the weight.

Max got covered in glue. Turns out he loves the flour and water mix. I had to redo the legs because he licked the glue off.

Once it was dry I covered it with cloth and PVA glue. A bit if fiddling to get the bars on the cage sitting straight and the little cat the right size to just fit the cage ( poor cat!)

All ready for the paint job.

Fortunately we had great drying weather, and dry enough to the painting outside. There was a lot of paint being splashed around!

The Cat Burglar installed at the exhibition.

She turned out a bit gentler looking than a lot of my creations.

Featured Artist 2021

Every summer the Otago Art Society runs a ‘featured artist ‘spot. One off the smaller galleries is available to set up a display and spend the week making art in the gallery.

Packing up ready to go

It’s a great experience for visitors and artists. For a mixed media artist it means a lot of traipsing up and down stairs with armfuls of critters and materials. I never realize just how much stuff I have until I’m climbing those stairs!

Set up ready for work!

Have had some amazing conversations with many interesting people, many of them artists themselves, a great sharing of tips and tricks, ideas and stories. I got a fair bit of work done too, so great for the discipline, no distracting dog enticing me off for a walk.

My work is a bit polarizing, people either love it or hate it. It’s all worth the trouble for the visitors that really get it, I love the expressions as people walk through the door!

All in all, a successful week, had some absolute gems of visitors, got a bit done, covered all the emotions from intense dislike (it’s ghastly!) to absolute delight (it’s amazing!) even whimpers of terror from a small child (sorry about that!)

I sensed some disappointment with some visitors that I’m quite an ordinary person dressed in a black T shirt and a pinny. I may have to develop into a more colourful character to match the works!

A Special Project

Following on from my little baker woman in the “Ingredients” exhibition, my father and I cooked up a wee idea for a couple of painting for two very special family members. I thought it might be a great idea to use a similar format but make the items in the cupboards personal.

My Baker lady from the “Ingredients” exhibition

So I put together a couple of odd little women with more personal items. The benchtop from the house, an old wallpaper pattern from a past house, a mosaic house number, a painting painted, quilting, handcrafted items, a view from a window….

It was a great experience and quite challenging getting the “flavor’ of the artworks right. I also found when a painting is for someone in particular, a lot of time is spent making it as good as it can be. Quite different from creating something and someone buying it. You know if they’re buying it they love it!

The discipline of working to a particular idea for someone is good though.

The first one created, who remembers the white lacy tablecloths?

The second painting. I enjoyed the details.

"Ingredients"

Sometimes ideas are very clear and happen with very little work.

Ryman Heathcare residents provided us with their favorite recipes for this themed exhibition. Flicking through the recipes looking for inspiration, I came across a reference to Butterfly cakes, delightful sounding cakes called “Miracles”, Gingerbread and an Orange Turkey. Instantly I had a picture in my head of flying Butterfly cakes, a fox with gingerbread man and well…an orange turkey.

I’m intrigued as to where such clear ideas come from and always a bit uneasy, Is it my idea? Have I seen it before? Am I imagining or remembering? I suspect most of my ideas are a mix of all this, much like a recipe.

Firstly the oil painting. Realizing I needed to get it underway to allow for drying time I started building it up. The cupcakes were to be the very last thing added.

Then began on a couple of foxes and a turkey. Had an idea to have a fox leaping up in the air with a gingerbread man on his nose and one with a gingerbread man in a saddle. The leaping fox turned out a little clumsy. Fortunately I only need two works (usually have an extra in the pipeline for these sort of issues) and the turkey almost complete.

The New Assistant

As an artist a lot of your time is spent alone. An assistant is great for letting you know when you need a break. My old assistants Ned and Eve were loyal supporters offering great moral support and extremely reliable.

After Ned the Executive Assistant passed away a few years ago. I got a new helper, instantly causing Eve to resign and spend her days in the bedroom sleeping, an unresolvable conflict of personality. New assistant Max has proved challenging.

I’ve given him the role of health and safety officer, letting me know when I’ve spent too much time concentrating or sitting down. I now know when I need to have a quick play with a frisbee or go for a walk. He does make a great model too, showing me all the different angles a dog’s legs can go on. Inspirational nose too.

Loves to get right among the photo shoots as well, I can’t fault his enthusiasm. Still working on his listening skills and reliability.

Artistic Blindness

All artists know about this. It’s when you totally rearrange a painting around a cute bird you painted that you really like. Its when you are so much in love with the idea that you ignore the fact that the artwork is actually really horrible. It’s when you proudly show off your beautiful artwork to everybody only to be mortified a year later on realizing that it is a truly heinous piece of art.

I call this “Artistic Blindness” and I have many examples.

The piece above is a great example. I even took photos and finished it because I liked the idea and how the eyes came out. It’s actually really hard to show works that you know are failures, the knowing makes a big difference.

I am a finisher though I think it’s my upbringing. Even at 51 years of age at a restaurant I will eat the salad first ( sometimes yucky although nutritious ) before the other tasty morsels on the plate, so I finish the plate. (Thanks a lot Mum!) So often even when I know an artwork is not working I hate to give up on it.

I tried again with this idea, I call this one “Mrs. No-neck”. Failures are not so bad, they keep you humble and teach you more than your successes.

One of my more glaring examples was when at art school. The waist high two piece artwork was made from wire and plaster, it was supposed to represent limbs in an organic style free from the body (I did way too much thinking at art school! ) I proudly took it home where my Mum (a talented artist herself) let me put it on her front lawn where it sat all white and glorious for many years.

The one thing it took me a few years to realize was that it looked like a giant calcified dog turd, only enhanced over time by the moss growing on it.

The Manapouri Exhibition

I’ve been busy creating some works for an exhibition in Manapouri. The theme, being “flight” sat perfectly with my style and critters. It’s great to have a focus, it puts a little pressure on and a definite date for completion.

It all means a period of frantic busyness but great to get the works all coming together at the end.

There’s something wonderful about small town art exhibitions, usually held in the local multi-purpose hall, put together by an enthusiastic group of volunteers. I walk into a hall like that and it triggers great memories of flower shows, baking competitions, knitting, school fairs, school concerts, chocolate wheels, friendly people………….

The work got completed, packed up (Birdwoman fit right into the theme so went too), and off we went, car filled to the brim.

Multi tasking

I’ve had a few comments about the different mediums and styles, a few people have assumed the work on my site is from different artists. It does look a bit fractured I suppose, but I’m not sure what to do about that.

All the information I’ve read about presenting work online does suggest a unified image is best, and it make sense, people would know what to expect from your work. But what if I love paper Mache, painting and drawing? What if the aims I’m reaching for are different in each medium?

The fact that it bothers me is interesting in itself, maybe something to do with the organizing side of my personality? The way I see it, there’s three choices, make another profile and page, hide one aspect away and grow an artwork stash in my wardrobe or throw all my artistic wanderings up for anyone to see.

Obviously I went for option 3. I have enough trouble managing one me and although I already have a large wardrobe stash of artworks I do like to show off the good ones.

At the moment I’m working on a couple of paintings for one exhibition, and finishing a few paper Mache works for an exhibition in Manapouri.

It’s a good working mix. The painting is detailed work, I’m intensely focused the whole time, whereas the paper Mache is more physical. There are periods of concentration, but a lot of hands on work., so I can give my brain a rest while I do the repetitive stuff.

The Darkest Light

I’ve been busy painting to a theme “Shadows and Light”. These small oil paintings I’ve been working on lately I’ve been loosely calling my “freaky faces” series.

The titles had to be in long before the artworks, so unusually for me, I had to dream up a couple of names first. I went with “The Darkest Light” and “Dark Dreams”.

Like most of my work including the paper Mache works, I don’t like to plan too much. Starting with a rough idea about what I’m doing, I like to build up the piece with a fairly loose hand, letting all the elements fall into place as I go. I never begin with a sketch, just straight in with the paint ( I usually carry a rough sketch in my head.)

The danger in this is that sometimes I have to lose a particularly beautifully painted part for the good of the whole. Its a very rewarding way to work though, I’m problem-solving all the way to the end. It gets me thinking of the work as a mysterious journey.

My paint of choice is a water mixable oil. It has a lovely oily texture with the convenience of a soap and water cleanup. Being slow drying it also forces me to slow down and think about the next steps, which I need ( I’ve ruined more than a few paintings by pushing ahead before I’ve thought about what I’m doing.)

The Darkest light

I liked the idea of a central figure with a background of wee beasties emerging from the dark.

Dark Dreams

Medusa comes home

Time for Medusa to come home. She’s been the meeter and greeter at the Otago Art Society gallery for the past year. Apparently she was frightening too many small children (naughty monster!). So she’s taken up residence in my lounge again, watching us watching TV.

She was originally made for a nude themed exhibition, I had really wanted to make a human-sized sculpture, and leaning more towards monstrous ideas I decided on a nude Medusa.

My grandchildren don’t go on a bear hunt at my house, we take torches and go on a monster hunt! We creep up to them, hold their hands, touch sharp teeth, shine touches into their glass eyes and pat their fur.

I’m not sure of the long term psychological effects but after seeing Medusa and Birdwoman, they are developing a tendency to draw monsters with ”boobies” and are convinced Medusa has a “diddle”.

Now, my Medusa is a strong, independent all woman-monster but I decided not to explain the difference between a penis and tentacle pubic hair. Some things are just best left unexplained.